02 Jul Stupid Crooks on Video
Stupid Crooks on Video
Security Humor: The proliferation of security cameras has made burglary and even armed robbery more difficult to get away with. To be sure, there are ways for the crooks to try to defeat the cameras, such as wearing disguises or masks. But, noting the average intelligence of the typical break-in or stick-up artist, the cameras often catch a surprising number of crooks not only doing illegal things, but doing them stupidly.
In 1995, a man named McArthur Wheeler walked into two banks in Pittsburgh and robbed them with no obvious attempt at a disguise. MindHacks reports that the police arrested the surprised criminal some hours later. Wheeler, obviously shocked that he was caught so easily, was heard to mutter, “But I used the juice.” Upon further questioning, Wheeler revealed that he had covered his face and features with lemon juice, for some reason being under the impressions that this would render him invisible to security cameras. Where he got that remarkable idea was not revealed.
97.3, a country music station in Lafayette, Louisiana, relates the story of a stupid crook who tried to break into a convenience store in Redding, California. The fellow showed his full face to the camera, wearing easily-identified polka dot pants. Clearly not in shape for his chosen line of work, he threw an object against the pane glass window, cracking it but not breaking it. Thinking the better of what he tried to do he fled, tripping and falling, likely leaving blood evidence in the parking lot.
The UK Daily Mail related the story of an incident in Australia where a group of thugs approached a motor bike shop in full view of the security camera, even going so far as to give it the finger to show their contempt for the law. Four of the would-be crooks had obscured their faces with hoodies. One, however, had not and revealed his full face for the camera. His mates pointed this out and had him cover his face. But, it was too late. His face was recorded for posterity. The men tried to gain entry into the shop using a truck to ram through the front window, but to no avail. The crooks, having severely damaged the front of the shop, fled empty-handed.
The Daily Motion related the story of a crook in Houston named Danny Weston who had expensive tastes in designer eyewear. He would go to various optometrist offices with the story that he had a broken pair of eyeglasses and needed them fixed. When the technician went to the back to fix the glasses, Mr. Weston, a career criminal who has been in and out of jail since the late 1990s, would loot the shelves of the most expensive eyewear he could find and then flee. He hit several shops in this manner, causes eyeglasses shops in Houston to exchange information and post pictures.
Weston demonstrated that he did not know the principle of never returning to the scene of the crime by visiting the first optometrist office he had hit to try it again. The technician, noting the man’s picture on the wall, called the police instead, who duly arrived and took Weston into custody.
Finally, USA Today shows that even if there isn’t a security camera involved in the initial crime, video can still catch a criminal who is stupid enough. Two men stole a man’s money and iPad. They then proceeded to make a video on the stolen iPad boasting of their crime. The video was automatically backed up to the victim’s iCloud account, but even if it hadn’t, it wouldn’t have mattered. One of the perps uploaded the video confession to his own Facebook account, thus proving the adage that social media provides a new opportunity for stupid crooks to compound their stupidity.
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